Knowing Your Values - Changing Your Values

Some of the values that you have learned in the past may not be the best values for you now. Let's imagine that you were brought up in a family where self-expression was discouraged and following the rules without question was expected.

As an adult, you find yourself working in a field, say marketing, that you enjoy but you are expected to express yourself. Further, you discover that most marketing companies and indeed the wider society are encouraging and expecting appropriate self-expression.

What do you do?

The most important first step is to ask the question,

'Do I want self expression as a value?'

If your answer is 'Yes', then decide on your expectations for this value e.g.

• I express myself on all occasions at all times. 

or

• I express myself freely at work and outside work I listen more than I express. 

or

• I balance self-expression with listening both at work and with family and friends. 

You may then practice your new behaviours knowing that it will take some time to let go of your previous value and adopt your new one. Making your values and their expectations conscious will assist you to make the change but it is wise to remember the power of the unconscious mind.

Reflection on the reasons for your changes will help keep you on track but for lasting and more immediate change, it is useful for these changes to occur at a neurological level.

(See Article on NLP)